6.5 Góa the̍h-khí Sèng-keng khai-sí tha̍k [Gí-im]
Chū án-ne, tiāⁿ-tio̍h sī Thiⁿ-kong ê ín-chhōa, góa tī siuⁿ-á ni̍h hoat-hiān tī-liâu lêng-hûn hām bah-thé ê hó-io̍h. Góa kā siuⁿ-á phah-khui, chhōe tio̍h góa boeh chhōe ê mi̍h -- hun-chháu. In-ūi góa pó-chûn ê kúi-pún chheh mā tī hia, góa the̍h-chhut chá-chêng kóng kòe ê kî-tiong chi̍t-pún Sèng-keng, che kàu taⁿ góa iáu bô-êng mā bô hèng-chhù boeh khòaⁿ. Góa kā Sèng-keng hām hun-chháu chah lâi khǹg tī toh-á téng.
Góa m̄-chai án-chóaⁿ iōng hun-chháu tī-pēⁿ, mā m̄-chai he kám chin-chiàⁿ ū-hāu. Só͘-tì, góa chò kúi-ā ê si̍t-giām, kià-bāng chóng ū chi̍t-ê ū-hāu. Siōng thâu-seng, góa the̍h chi̍t-hio̍h hun-chháu, khǹg tī chhùi-ni̍h pō͘; chi̍t-ē-á góa tō thâu-hîn. Hun-hio̍h iáu chheⁿ, bī chin chhàu-chhèⁿ, góa bô siáⁿ ē koàn-sì. Koh-lâi, góa the̍h chi̍t-kóa kā chìm tī rum-chiú chi̍t/nn̄g tiám-cheng, koat-tēng tī khùn chêng kā lim. Siōng-bóe, góa kā hun-chháu khǹg tī hóe-thòaⁿ pôaⁿ-á sio, kō͘ phīⁿ chīn-liōng suh he ian, jím-siū sio-khì, mā jím-siū cha̍k-phīⁿ.
Tī chìn-hêng tiong-kan, góa the̍h-khí Sèng-keng, khai-sí tha̍k. In-ūi hun-chháu ê koan-hē, góa thâu-khak hîn-hîn, tī hit-sî bô hoat-tō͘ jīn-chin tha̍k, kan-ta chhìn-chhái hian-chheh, khòaⁿ tio̍h ê tē-it kù ōe sī:
"Tī khùn-lân ê sî, kiò Góa, Góa ē kiù lí, lí tio̍h o-ló Góa."
Chiah-ê ōe chin ha̍h góa ê chōng-hóng, tha̍k-liáu hō͘ góa lâu chi̍t-ê ìn-siōng, sui-bóng bô chhiūⁿ āu-lâi ê hiah chhim. In-ūi, kóng tio̍h kái-kiù, chit-kù ōe tùi góa lâi kóng, bô siaⁿ-soeh. Chit-ê tāi-chì chin iâu-oán, chiū góa tùi tāi-chì ê lí-kái, sī bô khó-lêng. Chū án-ne, góa tō ná chhiūⁿ Israel chú-bîn pī èng-ún ū bah thang chia̍h ê sî, mn̄g:
"Sîn ē-tàng tī khòng-iá pâi iàn-se̍k bô?", góa khui-chhùi kóng, "Sîn Ka-tī ē-tàng kā góa ùi chit só͘-chāi kiù chhut-khì bô?"
In-ūi tio̍h kúi-ā nî í-āu chiah chhut-hiān tit-kiù ê hi-bāng, chit-ê gî-būn it-ti̍t tîⁿ tī góa ê sim-lāi. Put-jî-kò, chiah-ê ōe hō͘ góa ìn-siōng chin chhim, góa put-sî su-khó i ê ì-sù.
Chit-sî í-keng òaⁿ, tú-chiah kóng kòe, góa thâu-khak hō͘ hun-chháu pìⁿ kah hîn-hîn, teh khí ài-khùn. Góa lâu teng-hóe tī chio̍h-tōng tiám tio̍h, hong-piān pòaⁿ-mê bān-it su-iàu khí-lâi, góa tō khì khùn. M̄-koh, tó lo̍h bîn-chhn̂g chìn-chêng, góa chò chi̍t-ê chit sì-lâng m̄-bat chò ê tāi-chì -- kūi lo̍h-lâi kî-tó, kiû Sîn tah-èng, tī góa lo̍h-lān ê sî, tio̍h lâi kiù góa. Chit-ê lak-chhat koh bô oân-chéng ê kî-tó liáu, góa kā chìm hun-chháu ê rum-chiú lim lo̍h. He chiú chin kāu koh ke hun-chháu chhèⁿ, ū-kàu pháiⁿ lim. Lim liáu, góa sûi chiūⁿ-chhn̂g.
Góa sûi kám-kak io̍h-chiú chhèng kàu thâu-khak, m̄-koh góa khùn kah chin lo̍h-bîn; cheng-sîn ê sî, khòaⁿ ji̍t-thâu, chiah-chai í-keng sī keh-kang ē-tàu boeh 3 tiám ah -- m̄-tio̍h, chiàu taⁿ góa siūⁿ, chin khó-lêng tē-jī kang góa khùn chi̍t-mê chi̍t-ji̍t, sī kàu tē-saⁿ kang ē-tàu 3 tiám chiah cheng-sîn. In-ūi, kúi-nî í-āu góa hoat-hiān, tī chit lé-pài ê ji̍t-kì kiám sǹg chi̍t-kang, bô hoat-tō͘ kái-soeh. Nā sī kóng, góa lâi-hôe keng-kòe chhiah-tō, sit khì sî-kan, kiám sǹg ê eng-kai put-chí chi̍t-kang. Sū-si̍t sī, góa khak-si̍t kiám sǹg chi̍t-kang, tān-sī m̄-chai goân-in. Put-jî-kò, m̄-koán sī án-chóaⁿ, tán góa cheng-sîn, góa kám-kak te̍k-pia̍t khùiⁿ-oa̍h, chheng-sóng koh ū goân-khì. Khí-chhn̂g liáu-āu, góa kám-kak pí chêng-kang khah ū khùi-la̍t, ūi-kháu khui, in-ūi kám-kak iau. Kán-tan kóng, keh-kang góa ê pēⁿ bô hoat-chok, jî-chhiáⁿ kè-sio̍k chin kín ho̍k-goân. Chit-ji̍t sī [6 goe̍h] 29.
[6 goe̍h] 30 -- Tong-jiân, sin-thé ke chin hó ah, chah chhèng chhut-mn̂g, m̄-koh m̄-káⁿ kiâⁿ siuⁿ hn̄g. Góa phah tio̍h chi̍t/nn̄g chiah hái-chiáu, ká-ná sī o͘-gān (brandgoose), chah tńg chhù, m̄-koh bô siūⁿ boeh chú lâi chia̍h. Só͘-tì, góa chia̍h chi̍t-kóa hái-ku nūi, kháu-bī bē-bái. E-àm góa koh lim chìm hun-hio̍h ê rum-chiú, in-ūi góa siūⁿ, cha-hng lim che ū-hāu. Chit-pái góa bô lim téng-pái hiah chē; góa bô pō͘ hun-chháu, mā bô àⁿ-thâu phīⁿ hun-ian. M̄-koh, keh-kang, its 7 goe̍h chhe 1, sin-thé bô chhiūⁿ góa siūⁿ ê hiah hó, in-ūi góa sió-khóa kám-mō͘, ka-chài bô giâm-tiōng.
7 goe̍h chhe 2 -- Góa koh kō͘ saⁿ-chióng hong-hoat tī pēⁿ, io̍h liōng hām tē-it pái kāng-khoán, io̍h-chiú lim nn̄g-pōe.
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6.5 我提起聖經開始讀 [語音]
自 án-ne, 定著是天公 ê 引 chhōa, 我 tī 箱仔 ni̍h 發現治療靈魂和肉體 ê 好藥. 我 kā 箱仔拍開, 揣著我欲揣 ê 物 -- 薰草. 因為我保存 ê 幾本冊 mā tī hia, 我提出早前講過 ê 其中一本聖經, 這到今我猶無閒 mā 無興趣欲看. 我 kā 聖經和薰草扎來囥 tī 桌仔頂.
我毋知按怎用薰草治病, mā 毋知 he 敢真正有效. 所致, 我做幾若个實驗, 寄望總有一个有效. 上頭先, 我提一葉薰草, 囥 tī 喙 ni̍h 哺; 一下仔我 tō 頭眩. 薰葉猶青, 味真臭腥, 我無啥會慣勢. 閣來, 我提一寡 kā 浸 tī rum 酒一兩點鐘, 決定 tī 睏前 kā 啉. 上尾, 我 kā 薰草囥 tī 火炭盤仔燒, kō͘ 鼻盡量欶 he 煙, 忍受燒氣, mā 忍受 cha̍k 鼻.
Tī 進行中間, 我提起聖經, 開始讀. 因為薰草 ê 關係, 我頭殼眩眩, tī 彼時無法度認真讀, 干焦凊彩掀冊, 看著 ê 第一句話是:
"Tī 困難 ê 時, 叫我, 我會救你, 你著 o-ló 我."
Chiah-ê 話真合我 ê 狀況, 讀了 hō͘ 我留一个印象, 雖罔無像後來 ê hiah 深. 因為, 講著解救, 這句話對我來講, 無聲說. 這个代誌真遙遠, 就我對代誌 ê 理解, 是無可能. 自 án-ne, 我 tō ná 像 Israel 子民被應允有肉通食 ê 時, 問:
"神 ē-tàng tī 曠野排宴席無?", 我開喙講, "神家己 ē-tàng kā 我 ùi 這所在救出去無?"
因為著幾若年以後才出現得救 ê 希望, chit-ê 疑問一直纏 tī 我 ê 心內. 不而過, chiah-ê 話 hō͘ 我印象真深, 我不時思考伊 ê 意思.
這時已經晏, 拄才講過, 我頭殼 hō͘ 薰草 pìⁿ kah 眩眩, teh 起愛睏. 我留燈火 tī 石洞點著, 方便半暝萬一需要起來, 我 tō 去睏. M̄-koh, 倒落眠床進前, 我做一个這世人 m̄-bat 做 ê 代誌 -- 跪落來祈禱, 求神答應, tī 我落難 ê 時, 著來救我. 這个 lak-chhat koh 無完整 ê 祈禱了, 我 kā 浸薰草 ê rum 酒啉落. He 酒真厚 koh 加薰草腥, 有夠歹啉. 啉了, 我隨上床.
我隨感覺藥酒衝到頭殼, m̄-koh 我睏 kah 真落眠; 精神 ê 時, 看日頭, 才知已經是隔工下晝欲 3 點 ah -- 毋著, 照今我想, 真可能第二工我睏一暝一日, 是到第三工下晝 3 點才精神. 因為, 幾年以後我發現, tī 這禮拜 ê 日記減算一工, 無法度解說. 若是講, 我來回經過赤道, 失去時間, 減算 ê 應該不止一工. 事實是, 我確實減算一工, 但是毋知原因. 不而過, 毋管是按怎, 等我精神, 我感覺特別快活, 清爽 koh 有元氣. 起床了後, 我感覺比前工較有氣力, 胃口開, 因為感覺枵. 簡單講, 隔工我 ê 病無發作, 而且繼續真緊復原. 這日是 [6 月] 29.
[6 月] 30 -- 當然, 身體加真好 ah, 扎銃出門, m̄-koh 毋敢行 siuⁿ 遠. 我拍著一兩隻海鳥, ká-ná 是烏雁 (brandgoose), 扎轉厝, m̄-koh 無想欲煮來食. 所致, 我食一寡海龜 nūi, 口味袂䆀. 下暗我 koh 啉浸薰葉 ê rum 酒, 因為我想, 昨昏啉這有效. 這擺我無啉頂擺 hiah 濟; 我無哺薰草, mā 無 àⁿ 頭鼻薰煙. M̄-koh, 隔工, its 7 月初 1, 身體無像我想 ê hiah 好, 因為我小可感冒, 佳哉無嚴重.
7 月初 2 -- 我 koh kō͘ 三種方法治病, 藥量和第一擺仝款, 藥酒啉兩倍.
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6.5
I went, directed by Heaven no doubt; for in this chest I found a cure both for soul and body. I opened the chest, and found what I looked for, the tobacco; and as the few books I had saved lay there too, I took out one of the Bibles which I mentioned before, and which to this time I had not found leisure or inclination to look into. I say, I took it out, and brought both that and the tobacco with me to the table. /
What use to make of the tobacco I knew not, in my distemper, or whether it was good for it or no: but I tried several experiments with it, as if I was resolved it should hit one way or other. I first took a piece of leaf, and chewed it in my mouth, which, indeed, at first almost stupefied my brain, the tobacco being green and strong, and that I had not been much used to. Then I took some and steeped it an hour or two in some rum, and resolved to take a dose of it when I lay down; and lastly, I burnt some upon a pan of coals, and held my nose close over the smoke of it as long as I could bear it, as well for the heat as almost for suffocation. /
In the interval of this operation I took up the Bible and began to read; but my head was too much disturbed with the tobacco to bear reading, at least at that time; only, having opened the book casually, the first words that occurred to me were these,
“Call on Me in the day of trouble, and I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify Me.”
These words were very apt to my case, and made some impression upon my thoughts at the time of reading them, though not so much as they did afterwards; for, as for being delivered, the word had no sound, as I may say, to me; the thing was so remote, so impossible in my apprehension of things, that I began to say, as the children of Israel did when they were promised flesh to eat,
“Can God spread a table in the wilderness?” so I began to say, “Can God Himself deliver me from this place?”
And as it was not for many years that any hopes appeared, this prevailed very often upon my thoughts; but, however, the words made a great impression upon me, and I mused upon them very often. /
It grew now late, and the tobacco had, as I said, dozed my head so much that I inclined to sleep; so I left my lamp burning in the cave, lest I should want anything in the night, and went to bed. But before I lay down, I did what I never had done in all my life—I kneeled down, and prayed to God to fulfil the promise to me, that if I called upon Him in the day of trouble, He would deliver me. After my broken and imperfect prayer was over, I drank the rum in which I had steeped the tobacco, which was so strong and rank of the tobacco that I could scarcely get it down; immediately upon this I went to bed. /
I found presently it flew up into my head violently; but I fell into a sound sleep, and waked no more till, by the sun, it must necessarily be near three o’clock in the afternoon the next day—nay, to this hour I am partly of opinion that I slept all the next day and night, and till almost three the day after; for otherwise I know not how I should lose a day out of my reckoning in the days of the week, as it appeared some years after I had done; for if I had lost it by crossing and recrossing the line, I should have lost more than one day; but certainly I lost a day in my account, and never knew which way. Be that, however, one way or the other, when I awaked I found myself exceedingly refreshed, and my spirits lively and cheerful; when I got up I was stronger than I was the day before, and my stomach better, for I was hungry; and, in short, I had no fit the next day, but continued much altered for the better. This was the 29th.
The 30th was my well day, of course, and I went abroad with my gun, but did not care to travel too far. I killed a sea-fowl or two, something like a brandgoose, and brought them home, but was not very forward to eat them; so I ate some more of the turtle’s eggs, which were very good. This evening I renewed the medicine, which I had supposed did me good the day before—the tobacco steeped in rum; only I did not take so much as before, nor did I chew any of the leaf, or hold my head over the smoke; however, I was not so well the next day, which was the first of July, as I hoped I should have been; for I had a little spice of the cold fit, but it was not much.
July 2.—I renewed the medicine all the three ways; and dosed myself with it as at first, and doubled the quantity which I drank.
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